Why I love Starbucks

There are 2 groups of people in the world - those who love Starbucks and those who hate it. The haters have their reasons - the most common one I've heard is - "$4 cup of coffee!!. I'm not crazy!" That's fair. I fall in the other camp - I love Starbucks. And the other day I had an incident which made me realize why I love it. I had a rare morning to myself - kids dropped off at school, husband was out of town and I wasn't going to work. Although I'm getting closer to the appropriate age for it, I've had the longest mid life crisis going on - for about 10 years now, I've struggled with reconciling my passion for writing, reading and learning with my professional life which is not always about those things. Every couple of months, my internal struggle raises its head and either spurs me to do something (this blog was created during one of those fits) or pushes me deep into general melancholy. So, on this particular day, I was tending more towards the melancholy and I decided some quiet time with coffee and the New York Times would do me good.

I was lucky enough to grab one of the comfy, overstuffed chairs next to 2 other women. Both of them were considerably older than me - one by about 10 or so years (I'll call her the tall lady) and the other maybe 20-30 years my senior (I'll call her the D&G lady for the stylish bag she was carrying). As I sat there browsing the Times, I overheard the most fabulous conversation ever. The D&G lady complimented the tall women on her elegance. They got to talking and I learned that the D&G lady had just published her first book and it was on Amazon's bestseller list in it's category. Then the tall lady told her that she used to be a professional runway model and now she was working on her PhD through a University in California. She was also an essayist and was working on a dissertation. I couldn't catch more details about the book or the topic of the dissertation, but I heard enough to leave me feeling inspired and refreshed. I couldn't believe that I had been beating myself up about not having written anything and for feeling that I was out of time for doing "something".

So I'm glad that I spent the $3 that day for that cup of coffee. It gave me so much more than my morning caffeine fix. I'm also grateful that I got to hear this conversation between these two amazing and inspiring women. They'll never know that they left me so much more energized and hopeful than what I was when I walked in.

And that's why I love Starbucks. For creating not just a place to get coffee but that ambiance where people can get together over coffee, over music, over books. Sure you could brew that cup at home but sometimes, its nice to be forced into the company of folks, even if you don't talk to them.

My adventures in fashion

Today I picked up the September issue of Seattle magazine - its the STYLE GUIDE issue for those of you who have not seen it. I realised then that the only magazines I buy anymore are a copy of fashion and style related magazines every few months.

Fashion is definitely not a first language for me although I've come to enjoy it as I've started to study the nuances. Growing up in India, I was a bright student and encouraged to be just that - a good student and a good girl. And good girls, in the circles we moved in, did not attract attention through their clothes or their style. I'm devoting a chapter to my early sartorial struggles in the memoirs that I hope to publish someday. For now though, I thought it might be fun to share the lessons I have learned through watching stylish people, reading the style guides and experimenting with trends and clothes. This is what works for me - so take what sounds good or comment on what does not sound right. If you, like me, are piecing this together as you go, please share your tips and pointers!

1. Wear work clothes to work - This is for the ladies that work outside home, obviously. When I worked in New York, there were actual dress codes and since I worked at Time Inc. - home of People, InStyle, Real Simple magazines, dressing for work was..well, real work. And then I moved to Seattle and started working at Microsoft. Lets just say that things are a little bit more laid back about work attire here. I've been here 4 years and have come back to the realization that while its nice to have the flexibility to show up for work in jeans and T-shirts, as a rule, you might want to be err on the side of too formal rather than too casual at work. For me, it puts me in a different frame of mind and attitude and I think that changes attitudes of other people towards me. I recently went back and bought some more formal pants and dresses and while I am not giving up my jeans, I'm feeling a little more professional in my black pants and high heels.

2. Invest in the basics - On the topic of black pants and high heels, after going through countless pairs of pants bought on sale or at a bargain price, my personal choice is now to buy the best that I can afford in the basics like black and gray pants, a white shirt, a good pair of jeans, classic high heeled pumps etc. I'm still not going overboard on these but I'll get the best that my money can buy and then experiment more with the tops and the accessories. I've realised that buying clothes only to donate them to the thrift shop in 3 months is not necessarily a route to saving money on clothes.

3. Play with accessories - This is an area I continue to experiment with but watching many, many fashion forward women and my little steps into the field have shown me that having fun with accessories pays off. I just got rid of a pair of purple shoes that never failed to brighten up any outfit I wore and were surprisingly not completely in your face either. Last year, I had surgery on my neck and I was forced to try on scarves which are now my favorite outfit enhancer. I've tried hats too - my current favorite is one my husband brought back from one of his trips to London. Rings, earrings - I don't change them as often as I should but I'm happier when I do. I definitely recommend venturing out and experimenting with these little fun add ons.

4. "Pick me up" buys - I am the prudent shopper in my family - not one to spend too much or spend lightly. That said, my favorite activity in New York was to slip out during lunch or after work and wander into one of the countless New York stores. I picked up a sweater here, a pair of shoes there or a dress sometimes. It kept my wardrobe fresh and updated and gave me the little boost I needed in the middle of a work week. Its harder to do when you work on the Microsoft campus but I fit in a trip to the mall on my way back from work or after grocery shopping - keeps things fresh!

5. Consult the experts - As I mentioned in the beginning, every few months, I'll buy a copy of Lucky or InStyle or whatever magazine catches my fancy on the checkout stand. Although I almost never buy the stuff featured in the magazines, it gives me a sense of what's new and current and I can be on the lookout for stuff that works for me. I like to see how the professionals put an outfit together and take tips and tricks from them. I also check in with a few blogs regularly. One of my favorites is ww.lastylistmom.com written by a Mom who is a stylist and dresses celebrities for work. I bumped into her virtually on a parenting site where she offered style advice to Moms looking for the same. You can submit questions to her on her blog and she will come back with thoughtful and ever stylish options for you.
I also love Polyvore,com - for the sheer creativity and enthusiasm with which members put together outfits and ensembles there. Again, the point is not to buy but to get inspiration. Combining the best of above, check out the below collection or "set" in Polyvore lingo, created by LA Stylist Mom.

Edgy Event Ensemble Under $300 by L.A. Stylist Mom featuring a chain necklace

Fever Toulouse dress - grey
59 GBP - aspirestyle.co.uk
Grey dress »

Kelsi Dagger Kava
$75 - lorisshoes.com
Wedge shoes »

Ruche Vintage Floral Clutch
$50 - topshop.com
Vintage handbags »

ASOS Rhinestone Set Engraved Matte Metal Cocktail Ring
$17 - asos.com
Metal ring »

UO Rhinestone Chain Necklace
$28 - urbanoutfitters.com
Chain necklace »

Gold coloured pyramid stud earring
1.50 GBP - debenhams.com
H! by Henry Holland earrings »

So that's the fashion wisdom that I've gathered in my time here - if nothing else, I'm a good student and I'm great at learning from the experts. Some of these have worked well for me and hopefully will help some of you too. If you have advice, tips or tricks - bring them on! Stay stylin!

Books and stuff.....

Isn't it great when things just work the way they're supposed to -even better, they exceed your expectations and leave you delighted? After my rather negative post about Delta airlines (BT, I received a response and a small credit - not sure how much since I haven't read through their email yet), I've been looking for something pretty and positive and happy.

Last night, I finished reading a book and now that I am on the Kindle, of course, I went and bought a new one right away. How I feel at the end of a book is the best indicator of how I liked it. When I reach the end of a great book, I'm usually a little sad to put it down and a little worried if the next one will match up. If the book has not been too great, then I'm racing through the last few pages - looking forward to the next one, hoping it will be a better journey.

So last night, it was the latter -I finshed reading this book called Major Pettigrew's Last Stand .
The book has some glowing reviews on Amazon.com but I, for the most part, found it irritating. Set in a little pastoral village in the English countryside, the book deals with relationships between the "native" English and the Pakistani-English residents of the town. Without offering any spoilers, I thought the characters were all painfully sterotypical - from the Major's son, his American girlfriend to every last member of the Pakistani-English family. There were Bollywood like flourishes and twists in the plot, which perhaps thrilled some of the adoring reviewers but left just a bad taste in my mouth - I can take loud characters and fantastical turns in my Hindi movies but I'd like my books to stay out of that realm please.

And so last night, I zipped through the last few pages of Major Pettigrew and thankfully moved on the Kindle store to begin the search again. A friend had mentioned Lorrie Moore as a delightful writer and I decided to try out that recommendation. I bought "A Gate at the Stairs". I was a little wary at first since the title sounded a little too religious and at a very high level, the book is about a woman hired to provide childcare to an adopted girl. Lots of potential for things to get really maudlin there. Nothing turns me off a book faster than thick layers of cloying sentimentality, which, come to think of it, the Pettigrew book, had a lot of.

Anyway, I have been pleasantly surprised so far. The book has one less star on Amazon.com than the one above but I love it so much more. The writing is sharp, its snappy, its witty - the characters are complex and nuanced and the book is moving along at a great pace. Best of all, the book is funny in a droll and drab tone that I just love - the opposite of sentimental drooling. I read exceprts to Arjun last night and we both shared some good laughs. That to me, is a good test, if you and your 7 year old can both see the humor in a piece of writing. The protagonist's father - Bo - is a potato farmer and in describing him, she mentions his organic, quirky ways that distinguish him from his other farming brethren.
"He was known as a Tofu Tom, or Bo the Tofu prince or sometimes just 'Bofu', even though he grew potatoes." It was the Bofu that cracked us up. I'm looking forward to my reading time tonight!

And here also, is my brief critique of my Kindle.
Love - that I can buy a book as soon as I'm done with the last one, that I can carry all my books in that little slim device, that I can highlight and annotate - eventhough I have not yet done it yet and mostly I love it as a thoughtful present from my dear husband!
Hate - that I miss the coverart, i still miss the feel of holding a book, that I cannot lend a book I loved to a friend and that I can't just flip the pages back to a section - pressing the Prev page button is just not the same as remembering the feel of the book when you were at a certain page - know what I mean.

If you have good or bad book experiences, please share. I'm always looking for reommendations - and as you can see above, I remember and follow through on them.

Lastly, I will leave you with a delightful dust pan and bin - yes, you did read that right. Click on over to MocoLoco.com for an example of good design that brings a bit of joy and beauty to the most mundane household task. Hope that brings a smile to your day - happy Tuesday!

My open letter to Delta Airlines as a "Valued Medallion Member"

Dear Delta,
I am writing to tell you about my experience on a Delta flight (DL 0233 from Amsterdam to Seattle) on April 11th 2010. At the outset I want to mention that my husband and I are both Medallion members on Delta and have gone out of our way to book Delta flights for our very frequent travels. On April 11th 2010, I was flying back to Seattle from India via a KLM/Delta flight with my two children, ages 7 and 5.

I’m sure you understand that flying back from India to Seattle with 2 little children is a long, tiring and stressful experience. To add to this, on the second leg of the journey on the Delta operated flight, my son got sick. He told me his stomach hurt and so I got up to take him to the bathroom. As soon as we left our seats, he suddenly threw up. Since we were seated in the bulkhead seats right behind the Business class section, I put my hand over his mouth and rushed him to the Business Class restroom. He got quite sick and was passing out as I led him out of the restroom. While I was taking him back to the seat, one of the flight attendants stopped me and started telling me that I should have used a barf bag for him and also that I should have taken him to the Economy class restroom. I tried to explain to her that we were already in the passage and there was no time to either find the bag or walk to the back of the plane to the economy restroom. He had already vomited in the aisle and I wanted to get him to a restroom as quickly as possible. She continued to lecture me on how I could have done things and how they now need to clean up so many different places. Meanwhile, my son was fainting in my arms as I stood there listening to her. After this had gone on for some time, I told her I needed to get him to his seat and I could not believe she had not asked me once if he was all right. I believe my exact words were, “ Lady, I have vomit on my clothes that I have to wear for the next 10 hours. There is also throw up next to my seat that I also need to be in for the duration of this very long flight. Do you think I planned this? Do you think I would have not done something differently if I could?” It seemed like she had hard time believing that I did not, in fact, conspire with my son to make him sick so we could have a pleasure of puking in the business class restroom or watching the crew scrub the aisle, which they did a very poor job of, I might add.

For the rest of the flight, the treatment that I got from the flight crew was shocking and humiliating. I held my daughter in my lap so that my son could use her seat and lie down. No member of the crew came to ask me how he was or if I needed a blanket, a pillow or even a glass of water for him. As they cleaned the passage, they made it a point to shake their heads and loudly complain to each other about the task. At one point, I specifically thanked one of the crew members as they were cleaning and told them I was sorry about the incident. He did not respond to me except to again shake his head in disgust. The crew also proceeded to ignore me for the rest of the flight – no one picked up the garbage from our seats, or offered water, tea or coffee when they came around the cabin. I was stuck in the plane for 10 hours with a sick child and no help in a very hostile environment.

It was an unfortunate occurrence. It is not a pleasant experience for anyone, especially for the mother, to have a child throw up violently and unexpectedly. However, it was not the calamity that the plane crew made it out to be – it was simply an incident that could have been handled with professionalism, grace and humanity. I would have been glad to pitch and help the crew as best as I could. However, they seemed to completely fall apart at this inconvenience that was thrown their way. This is a crew that we are supposed to trust with our lives – based on this reaction, I would hate to be in their hands if a real emergency was to happen on the plane.

I already wrote you about this - not surprisingly, have not heard back. So I thought I would do my friends a service and share this experience with them, so they know, when their kids are sick - to not go into the business class restroom, AT ANY COST. And, if their kids plan to get sick, they better do so with advance notice to the parents and crew - we wouldn't want to incovenience your crew, now, would we?

Sincerely,

Nikki Piplani.

On my mind - Precious, Idiots and the Texas Board of Education.

Education has been on my mind for some time now - last night, I had another of my frequent and completely unfounded anxiety attacks. I had a wonderful dinner with friends - the occassion was the visit to Seattle by a friend who moved to India after over a decade of living in the USA. It's a common enough occurence these days -and something more and more of expatriate Indians are aspiring to. I know that we have discussed it at length in our household - do we go back, do we stay, what are the pros and cons? The biggest topic of discussion is always, "What about the kids? Will the kids adjust?" We've all dissected, at length, the merits and demerits of the education system in India and America and where our kids are getting the maximum advantage.

We talked last night about how schools and kids in India are so competitive. It is something that I and all my contemprories who grew up in India are so familiar with -the pressure cooker, one dimensional approach to "success" - work hard, study hard and get good grades. Actually, get the best grades - beat your friends, beat your foes - fight with the faceless millions competing for the same seat in the same elite college. We've all had countless dinner party conversations around the topic - how we never had a chance to follow our dreams, how we were evaluated on academic success above all and we've all concluded with a sigh of relief that our kids have it so much better. Things in India are different now, I beleive, and kids who are growing up here in America have an embarrassment of choices about classes and activities from the mundane swimming and baseball to fencing, pottery and line drawing. There is less pressure here on kids to compete - at our first parent teacher conference, Puneet and I exchanged looks as the teacher stressed to us that we shoud not force the kids into extra work at home, fearing that we might turn them agains the concept of learning. I'm guessing the parent teacher conferences my Mom and Dad went to sounded very different.

My panic attack last night was related to just the above - we've followed the herd and scheduled Arjun in multiple after school activities - Martial Arts, Chess, Basketball and so on. School, meanwhile, is putzing along - he breezes through his weekly spelling tests, gets good report cards and in general, is well adjusted. Things appear to be fine. But of course, that's when, like a good Mom, I start to worry - is everything really OK? Are we doing too much extra stuff and not enough academics? Am I setting him up for failure by not pushing him to work harder? Should he be stressing a bit more about work? Should I have been prepping him for the gifted program? Is he learning enough? Will he be able to compete when he has to?

Puneet thinks I look for reasons to worry and I am sure I do - but I know I'm not alone in this. Dont we all worry about our children and want the best for them? I just read this article that led to a fresh set of worries about what our kids are learning - how much of their world view will be shaped by the decisions of bureaucrats and ideologues.
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=124861233&ft=1&f=1057

At the same time, as I work myself into a tizzy over these thoughts, I was reminded of the movie we were watching yesteday - Precious - the movie that won Monique her Oscar nomination. The movie about this teenager from Harlem who had every odd in the world stacked against her and yet, perseveres and goes on. It gave me the chills and made me come back to realization that I've had a few times now as I've gone about the process of raising my kids. This is my philosophy in general - If we are worrying about the children and their welfare, the kids will be OK. That's all they really, really need - parents who love them and want to do the best for them within the means available to them. Everything else, the best school over the good, the cursive handwriting or advanced placement class in algebra, is icing on the cake. It is hard to stay true to that belief while functioning in the soceity where parents, including us, worry about every aspect of parenting - from spending enough time to spending enough money - not too much, not too little - the elusive just right balance. Which leads me to my next observation - the more we have, the more we provide for our children, the more we worry about them. While millions of people worry about the basic necessities of survival, do we really need to be stressing that my child is "only" at the 92nd percentile of reasoning ability? I think not - it does not mean I do not do it. It only means that I stop and take a breath before breaking out in hives over that baskeball class registration deadline that I missed.

So while the worrying itself is not productive, I've accepted that it is part of parenting and perhaps an indicator that, in fact, ALL IS WELL! For those of you not up to speed on your Bollywood happenings, I suggest you head on over to YouTube and check out 3 Idiots. Let me know what you think!

Interesting article here about the banning of burqas in France - http://www.huffingtonpost.com/anushay-hossain/for-france-banning-the-bu_b_437261.html

Could there be a topic more touchy? In the Western & Eastern worlds, Islam and all its associated artifacts from towers in Netherlands to burqas in France, whip people into a frenzy normally reserved for sporting events or political rallies. So, I thought the author here made an excellent point where the presumed intentions, the showy rhetoric and the final consequences do not line up - to say the least. If the aim is to facilitate the liberation of Muslim women, banning the burqa - partially banning the burqa, I must add - seems like an easy, ill thought out tactic - geared more to populist stance than any real aim at reform. Of course, real reform is not easy, it is not good politics - as Mr Obama has well learned. So perhaps, this might be the best and wisest any politician can do. Is it good enough though?

Its a scenario I've watched unfold several times in my smaller sphere - mostly at work in different companies. The problem is too big and too hairy - solving the real issue would take too much sacrifice and long term focus. So, people take the easiest route - knock down 1-2 things, create some new names and make a big announcement and then - its back to business as usual. Metrics are carefully chosen (rigged, dare I say?) to reflect progress and ensure fat year end bonuses. If you are a thinking and analyzing person, things can get discouraging real fast. All this to say, I do not have a solution to the rampant populism and short term-ism, of course. What I do have is an eye for spotting BS and calling it out in whatever forum I can. The challenge is to keep my job and my integrity - and so far, to the credit of people and companies I've worked for, I've kept both.

Now, if you are truly looking for some innovative thinking to solve a real world problem, take a look at this chicken coop designed for the urban farmer - beautiful and practical. Perhaps we need more "real" artists in the world - and certainly more of them in politics and business.

http://design-milk.com/handcrafted-chicken-coops-by-drew-waters/

Bringing Copenhagen closer

I'm always tickled pink when I get to learn something from my two little smartie pant kids. The other day, as I cleaned out a glass jar and prepared to toss it into the Recycle bin, Saanya came running from where she was putting her doll baby to bed and snatched the jar out of my hand, "Mommy, don't recycle, reuse." Arjun joined the crime scene with a concerned look on his face and then he proceeded to tell me about how the planet was being choked by landfills.
"We need to make less trash, Mommy," they both sermonized and humbled, I tucked the jar away, vowing to find something to put in it.
While this little exchange warmed my heart and gave me a little boost at the political awareness of the next generation, I will admit that I have not been following Copenhagen so closely. I'm not un-jaded enough to have high hopes from a political summit. However, this piece here caught my eye today - it details the art installations around Copenhagen and whether you beleive in taking action against climate change or not, this is worth a look.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/starre-vartan/art-in-copenhagen-helping_b_393846.html

And then, if you are itching for a healthy dose of reality, click over to this section about the forces that are gearing up to derail any progress that **might** be made at the Summit.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/heather-taylormiesle/the-politics-back-home_b_393910.html

Lessons from Boston's City Hall and from David Plouffe

Just came across this story this morning about how the city of Boston is empowering its citizens using the iPhone. Not only is the app itself cool - you take a picture of a pothole and it recognizes and enters coordinates - that is cool! - but also, refreshing to see city officials keeping up with the times and using a technology to connect with and simplify lives of citizens! I'm already a huge fan of the Wi-Fi option available on some Seattle buses - here's to hoping there's more coming!

On another note, I'm currently reading the memoir of David Plouffe, Obama's campaign manager. The book itself is rather dry - no literary flourishes there - but I'm rather surprised at the detailed use of metrics & intelligence within the campaign. I'd heard all the stories about the tech savviness of Obama's campaign and I expected to read about how they used the Internet and social media. More than that though, I've been struck by a few other things that any business could learn from as well
1. Early strategy setting and then sticking to the plan - Only about a 100 pages in so far but he hammers on the point of how they devised a clear strategy early on and then stuck to it with a strict discipline. The strategy itself was based very clearly on a detailed analysis of the playing field - the candidates strengths, electorate profiles, a gap analysis and a clear recommendation of what was needed. Again and again, he gives himself and Obama credit for sticking to the plan even when there was tremendous pressure to buckle and be diverted.

2. Great CRM (Customer relationship management) - I was amazed that they managed and cross referenced detailed voter lists against various sources. Matching Internet sign up lists with volunteers showing up at events and then against contributors to the campaign allowed them to paint an incredibly detailed picture of the kind of support base they were building and get an extremely accurate pulse on their campaign supporters. This is what I mean when I am preaching a 360 degree view of the customer.

3.Metrics - good ones - Even as the media and the country at large went nuts over every which poll that came out during the intense campaign period, he describes that they set their own, internal, more reflective metrics and measured themselves by those more than anything else. One specific instance is where the press reported total money raised by campaigns during the Primaries. However, there is apparently, a distinction between money that can be used during the primary itself and money that has to go to the General Election spending. By drawing this distinction internally and externally, they kept their own team focused on what mattered most at the moment and also probably highlighted their planning & strategy externally. Again, a great example of prescient strategy, great discipline and rock solid grasp of true metrics. As a business analyst, it made me think whether I had the right metrics to track progress against.

Great examples of innovative uses of technology and just clear headed and with-the-times thinking in American politics. Would love to see more examples!

Sarah, have you considered Bollywood?

Pop quiz time - What politician is the following remark (scraped from a friend's Facebook page) about?
"I am so sick of that woman - have been for months now. What did she do now?"
OK, so you really should not gloat about getting that one right. (If you did not get that one, however, then ..ahem.. well, living under a rock is not for everyone, but more power to you). So of course, I'm talking bout Sarah Palin and yes, following in the footsteps of most national news magazines and cable channels, I am devoting an entire post on my blog to her.

Despite the amazing success of her book, there is the real danger that Palin is close to jumping the shark. Like the Gosselins and Octomom and Sanford, once the book is replaced on the bestseller list or the next lying/cheating politician/sports star is discovered, she could find herself looking for ways to prolong those 15 seconds of fickle fame.

And that, actually, is the purpose of this article. To suggest a plausible, lucrative avenue of fame and fortune for Sarah Palin, which, as we say in the corporate world, would be a great fit for her strengths and talents. The question is simple - "Sarah, have you considered Bollywood?" Yes, Bollywood - the Indian movie industry, for the benefit of the under-rock dwellers that are reading this. Even as I write this, I cannot believe that there is not a proposal to the same effect being considered in the Palin household right now. Remember you heard it here first - remember that because it is going to happen and when you hear the news, I want you to recall where you first heard the genius plan. In case you doubt the logic of the plan, let me lay out for you why this makes perfect sense.

1. Alternate reality, no problem! - The problem that most people (the ones I know, at least) have with poor Palin is the sheer ridiculousness of her statements and assertions. You know, the Bridge to Nowhere, the Troopergate explanations, blah, blah. All those issues where people demand a sane, reasoned explanation of facts, like that other guy - the President of the USA, likes to present. So just because she does not do that, people tend to dismiss her, call her ...well, names and mock her. None of this, NONE of this will be a problem in Bollywood. We Hindi movie watchers have grown used to a world where inconvenient realities are simply dismissed and replaced with fantastical notions. We suspend rational thought and objective questioning everytime we walk into a darkened theater for our next dose of dream sequences, song and dance routines, 40 year olds playing college students and our beloved heroes bashing a team of muscled bad guys - while having a few bullets in their bodies. All we ask of our lead actors is for them to look good (check), invoke mass hysteria (check) and stay in the news (check). So, does it not sound like the perfect situation for Ms Palin? She would fit right in - she could go right on being the star - swooping in and saving the masses from the cruel excesses of....well, I'm sure the script writers will find something to plagiarize and "adapt".

2. Irrelevant - no problem! - As Denise Richards, Kylie Minogue and Sylvester Stallone have discovered, when you become irrelevant in the Western world, you pack your bags and flash some white skin and your foreign accent on the desi scene - voila, instant moolah and adulation. The Indian movie industry will open its arms to any white "has-been" or "wants to be" and luckily for Sarah, she could be either or both!
Bearing out the truth of points 1 &2 above, here is a video of Kylie Minogue in a recent Bollywood production proclaiming she wants to "Chiggy Wiggy with you boy". Hey, I don't know what that means either - it's not going to stop me from watching the movie and buying the song on iTunes.
More logical reasoning in the Sarah for Bollywood campaign after the jump


3. International relations - President Obama just hosted the first state dinner for Indian Prime Minister, Dr. Manmohan Singh. The entire world is scrambling to get in on a piece of India's rapid growth. Wouldn't this be a perfect opportunity for the possible future Presidential candidate to get some valuable experience on foreign shores? Ones that, in fact, she cannot see from her front porch? Think about it, she could also be inspiring her most rabid supporters to opening up their minds to other cultures. She could be building a bridge - this time it would lead somewhere. A bridge from Minnesota to Mumbai, from Kansas to Kolkata. The horizons that it would expand, the people it would connect! It could be a beautiful thing - you betcha! And as Barack has already proved, being an international rock star only helps political careers these days.

So there it is - it all makes perfect sense to me. I hope you are listening Sarah. And, no - its not a ploy to get you off the national news circuit here in America. This is an earnest appeal for you to expand your horizons and add to your list of blockbuster achievements - Going Rogue would make a good foundation for Bollywood's first female superhero thriller. Consider it, please!

In case you decide to pursue this, I'll leave you with a helpful guide to Bollywood, courtesy of IFC.com
http://www.ifc.com/news/bollywood/starter-kit.php

To New York and back.

Last week, I went on a business trip to New York. I was attending a conference there - and I think its fair to say that I have never awaited ANY conference as eagerly as I did this one. While I am excited and passionate about Digital Marketing, the prospect of heading to New York was equally (ok, a little more - oh all right, it was a lot more) exciting than the conference itself.

The day before I was supposed to leave though, I started to have this nasty sinking feeling I get anytime I am getting on a plane without my kids. "How," I wondered, "will they cope without me?" ignoring the fact that they would have the undivided attention of their Dadddy - unimaginable luxury!! "But I am the constant in their routines, with Dad travelling so much. It will be worse for me to be gone," I couldn't stop torturing myself.

I went - and sulked some more - at myself, for being so far away. But then, I was in Manhattan. I checked into the hotel and stepped outside. The hotel was a few blocks from Time & LIfe building - my former workplace. So there I was, back in my old neck of the woods. Very soon, I was part of the crowd, merrily jostling away - hurrying to get wherever it was I was going - even if, that particualr day, it was nowhere in particular. I crossed the street as soon as I spotted a gap in the traffic - never mind the stop hand sign - I squeezed in the narrowest opening between crowds of people and shook my head in loud impatience when the two ladies in front of me paused to admire Rockerfeller center. "Tourists" - I almost, just **almost** muttered under my breath.

The next few days were great. The kids did miss me and it was hard for me to hear thier voices and imagine them being home without me. But then, I figured, "I'm here - I better make it worth it." The conference was great - a new perspective on how the world is thinking about what I do, catching up with trends, listening to the experts and chatting with new people I met. It reaffirmed my faith in what I do, reassured me that my skills were current and reenergized me to shore up on the areas I wasn't too familiar with. In the evening, I went to dinner with friends or even by myself - choosing from the fabulous array of cuisines and styles that only New York has to offer. I walked everywhere - taking in the sights, the smells - I had forgotten the smell of street food and the undescribable blend of metal, trash and god knows what else that combines in the subway stations. I soaked in the sheer excitement and energy while also at times, watching from afar - I had been here a few years ago, running like the crowds now were, falling asleep on the train, exhausted from my crazy commute and insane schedule. I had been here and it took me about 30 minutes to get adjusted. How dramatic all this must seem to someone who came here as a tourist. I understtod, for the first time, all the things people always said when I told them I lived in New York and loved it. At times, I felt sorry I had left. I had broken from the constantly surging crowd - Now, I felt, I was out of the game - my life felt staid, composed and frankly, a little boring.

The morning when I was supposed to leave, I spent a tad too much time shopping with friends and was running behind as we ran to the subway. "Hey, just get on the next flight if you miss this one - more time in NY!" laughed a friend. The mere thought made me tense up. I made it on time - to the airport and to the plane. A long flight later, as we touched down in Seattle, I broke into a run as I exited the plane. I couldn't wait to see my family again.

So, of course, home is where the heart is. Amazing how profound these cliches feel when you arrive at the realization yourself. Good friends, a great job, a warm house and yes, no sprinkler for the lawn. Seattle is home for now - dont know how long. Permanent migrants is the term P has coined for us - always looking ahead to what's next. Maybe back to New York, maybe even further back to India, maybe we'll head forward somewhere completely new. Who knows - I thought as I spotted the two heads bobbing up and down in excitement as they saw me exiting the airport. "What did you get for us, Mommy? What did you get?" "I brought myself back," I grinned at them.

Ambiguous times call for firm measures

"Must be able to deal with ambiguity"....almost all job descriptions at Microsoft have that pre-qualification clause. I've never paid much attention to it - of course, I can deal with ambiguity.... for the right job. I mean, c'mon..what does that even mean?

Once I interviewed for a job where they asked me, "Are you comfortable with change?"
"Well, considering I have never lived in a place longer than 3 years for my entire life, I would say - Yes, I am quite comfortable with change." What I didn't say was, "I'm working on getting more comfortable with non-change." When things stay the same and nothing is changing, THAT is what drives me a little nuts. So maybe, by nature, some of us are more tuned to thriving in chaos..I've always enjoyed the novelty of a new setting and the challenge of creating order out of craziness. I do realize its not everyone's cup of tea..just had a conversation with a friend who was pulling his hair out in the midst of such a situation. Made me think - when things are a mess..stuff is happening and you don't know what to do or how it's all going to play out, what do you do? How do you take things in stride and keep doing your thing? How do you not let stuff drive you crazy? Here are some things that have worked for me in the past

1. Work in the universe I control - there are things you can influence and things you cannot. Staying within the realm of controllable and doing the best you can do there is the first thing to do. Actually, before you can stay in that universe, you identify that space. at work, especially, I have a tendency to get carried away and imagine doomsday scenarios. Everytime I find myself going there, I rein in the thoughts and ask myself - What about this, can I control? Can I do a better job in that sphere?" And then I redouble my efforts in that area, fortify myself against all eventualities and then let life (and upper management) do its thing. Sounds fair - right?

2. GGet all the information - Faced with the prospect of a re-org at work, I'm talking to a lot of people - including up and down my direct chain of command. They don't have all the answers - or perhaps they just want to share just yet, but having done my research - putting my questions, my preferences and my fears out there helps me relax. I'm also looking at other groups and observing what they do. In my spare time, I write out how I could work with X group - what would I be able to add to them, what skills could I apply?

3.Build Lists- I love lists...I plan and dream in lists. So when I am not sure what I am supposed to do next or I have a million things in my head, I write stuff down in a list. We're planning to trip soon - its going to cost a lot of money but there has been a new development in the family which means we might not be able to take the trip. We talked about it everyday and tried to move forward but every time we talked, we left it off somewhere unresolved because there was so much we don't know yet. So at night, before falling asleep, I wrote in my little notebook. What are the all the things I need to do if we are going - Buy tickets, Get Vacation time, Inform the kids Schools, Get work projects done by a certain date, Inform a friend that we would not be able to go their wedding. I marked each item on the list with what was "reversible" - if I informed my boss I needed time off and told him there was a chance I wouldn't go, that would be OK. Same for the kids' school and so on. Nothing really changes but having that written down and having drop dead dates for getting everything done in either case gives me a plan and a plan gives me comfort. I know - I'm a little neurotic that way.

5. Write The Plan - One step up from the list is the plan - the roadmap. Its a work tool that I shamefacedly admit, I have used for home - but I have not yet created a PowerPoint deck for a family presentation. I am,however, creating a powerpoint deck for work. As I expand my scope of work and take on more things to do, it sometimes get distracting to know exactly what I need to focus on and what I am missing. So I'm creating a step by step look at what I do, how I do it , who will help me and what I need to get done in the next month, quarter and so on. Just starting the work on that already helps calm the feeling of not being sure where I am supposed to be next.

6. One step at a time - The day tight compartment thing is the hardest for me to do - I am constantly drifting between wallowing in the past or creating future castles in the air. Not knowing what the future looks like can be a shaky foundation for those castles - and when I can't dream, I am miserable. In such time, I focus myself on building smaller castles. When we moved from New Jersey to Seattle and lived in corporate housing for a while, it was hard not knowing where we would be living, how our lives were going to fall in place. I focused then on small conquests - my goal each day was to do a little research on a town or neighborhood, another day it was to explore the area where we were living, another day I focused on getting something done at work - all small victories that I could check off my list and feel like I was in control

7. Treat myself - After I've used all my mind control to make sense of nonsense, I love to get a cup of coffee or whatever your guilty pleasure is and watch something fun/silly/absorbing on TV. Mad Men makes me forget the chaos of life - works every time - I promise!

The postracial world of .....TV Commercials?

Racism...its not a topic I had thought of too much before I came to America. Once here, of course, it has become central to my life. The fact that I am different was obvious and also thrust on me from multiple sources. Nothing is black and white (well, actuallty it is - and that's the point of this - but I really wasn't going there - just a bad pun!) anymore. For every action and reaction, I wonder - how much of this was spurred by the fact that I am Indian?

Early days in New York, I remember going to a salon on Long Island to get my hair blown out. The ladies at the salon raved about my "thick, dark, beautiful" hair. It had been no cause for celebration in India where thick, dark hair abounded and was mroe of a nuisance than an asset. Innocent remarks were sometimes funny as in when an older colleague at IBM asked me, "So, how do you celebrate birthdays in India?". "We cut a cake and sing Happy Birthday," I responded, unable to suppress a sarcastic smile. Once I moved to New York City, things were a little better - or maybe we just got used to being a minority. 9/11 was hard - not just because it was a traumatizing experience to watch as I walked the streets of New York while the planes were flying into the towers - but more because people actually suggested that we didn't feel the sadness and horror of the act because we were not the "targets" of the attack.

The move to Seattle has brought a fresh perspective to this ongoing debate in my head. Microsoft is a virtual microcosm of the world - not even in New York did I work with people from so many countries and backgrounds. But home is different - I live in an affluent suburb which still means - a mostly white suburb. While we definitely have made some very good friends in our neighborhood, there have been very ugly incidents which have made me think long and hard about what it means to live as a brown person in this society.

For a lot of the reasons above, I hailed and rejoiced in the election of President Obama. " What a great difference for all the balck people in this country," I remember thinking to myself, "to have a role model. To see this family in the White House." No matter what else happens, there is this person of color in the highest office of the land and that is something that has the power to inspire and motivate millions of young people, previously excluded from this conversation. I was exultant every time I watched the President and his family being fawned over. " I think we will apply to be citizens now," I emailed a friend as I watched the new first family on my TV.

Since then, I have heard lots of commentary on why the election of President Obama has not meant a post racial America. I agree, whole heartedly. However, there are subtle shifts - which is how, I think, change starts to brew. One trend I have noticed in that central pillar of the American capitalist structure - TV advertising. Commercials for household items like Tide, Cheerios, Campbell and NetFlix have been featuring black people - kids, fathers, grandfathers - as normal people with normal lives in normal houses. Just like the rest of the world. The Netflix guy even rides a bike in his leafy suburb. Of course, that has always been true - there is nothing new about the lives being depicted here. But, at least to me, the newness and power is in these images of normalcy finally being beamed down from TV sets across the country. These are normal people, folks - our neighbors. Nothing to fear. And that is a trend that I am celebrating and hoping to see more of. Now, if we could only stop seeing Indian characters with horribly pronounced accents. That would be a victory closer to home.

Watch the Cheerios ad below and click on over to youtube to watch the Tide Commercial. Tell me if there are others you see.

Getting it done...at what cost?

Wow! Whew! Repeat that a few times. What a few weeks this has been! Got done with the surgery and recovery and there I was, back in the wringer, being whipped around in a few different directions - simultaneously, for the most part. School started - A. is now in second grade - which means homework every night and questions - not necessarily academic - that are getting harder to handle and even harder to answer. At work, Windows 7 launch is right around the corner. Working at Microsoft in Windows is always fast paced but right about now, everything is stepped up a notch - make that 10 notches. Everytime I want to stop and take a breath - I remember a few things that need to get done. "Right after that," I tell myself, "right after that, I'll stop and put my feet up for a second." For instance, yesterday I was supposed to be at A.'s school for their walkathon fund raiser. I was up at 6AM to get work done so I could make the fundraiser. I made it there at 2 to walk laps around the school campus - but I had no time to eat lunch before then and felt faint after the first 3 rounds. I made it through - but barely. And then, at night, when I logged into Facebook - I saw this link posted by a friend.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/09/20/opinion/20dowd.html

I felt vindicated and sad at the same time as I read this through - everything that this article says about women and their position in soceity today, I said that about a 100 times to my husband and some friends. "Why did we have the feminism movement?" I keep asking him. Now, he just ignores the question since he knows what's coming right after that. But it is true - we created new areas for ourselves to judge ourselves and other women in, so we could do a better job of feeling bad about what we don't do. As my husband so eloquently marvelled the other day,"Wow! You feel guilty about so many things. It doesn't even enter my mind to think about half these things - let alone feel guilty." Hmmm.

I've thought this through a million times ..and counting. Where I always end up is here - As exhausting as my life is - it is also exhilirating and exciting. I love what I do - I have the grandest kids and husband in the world, bar none and all said and done, I like having a few balls in the air to juggle. Keeps me off the gossip! So then, I've asked myself the question which several people ask me - either with pity or with admiration - "How do you do it?" Here are the top things I could think of that keep things going and keep me sane - most of the time!
1. Be proud – First things first. I have to come out and say it – there is just too much guilt and working mommy bashing going around. I work really hard at keeping up with my job abd my family and I’m not about to let anyone make me feel bad about it. Actually, I’m proud of my life and that helps me to keep going every day. Whether you work for necessity, to pay the bills or or simply because you like to work, be proud of it. There is nothing wrong and everything right about showing your children that Mommy is contributing to the food they eat, the roof over their head, their college funds and that trip to DisneyLand. Or to show them that you can follow your passions and dreams and going to work every day at a job you love is a wonderful thing. There are a hundred different reasons why you work and instead of feeling guilty about it, celebrate those with your family every day. I’ve taken my kids to work, and I share with them my work events – nervousness around a big presentation, frustration that a project was not going well and we celebrate Mommy & Daddy’s successes at work – just like we celebrate their achievements at school or extracurricular activities.
2. Use your chores – The chronic complaint of time starved Moms is that they have no time to themselves. There is no time to relax or to sit back and take a breath. One of my close friends who is also a high level executive had this plaque on her desk – “2 things to do today – Breathe In, Breathe Out.” Sounds about right, doesn’t it? I’ve decided to not wait anymore for that perfect time when I will make arrangements for the kids to be cared for, find a time that works with my husband’s and my schedules, get dressed and get out of the house. Instead, I build in my relax time into chores I have to do. Once a week or so, after the kids are in bed, I bring down the laundry baskets, switch on the TV and settle down for a hour or two of laundry time while I catch up on some shows on TV. Similarly, when I’m going grocery shopping, I’ll get my iPod, if the weather is nice, I’ll roll down my car windows and make it a 45 minute getaway from the stuff that needs to get done at home. The Starbucks within the local QFC helps too – sometimes, I’ll grab a cup, buy a paper and get some reading done after I’m done with the shopping.
3. Give up on perfection – Being bombarded by ads and movies portraying idyllic families with hearty, healthy meals around the table, supermoms who have a solution to every family crisis and beautiful skin to top it all has left most of us feeling frustrated at the mundane nature of our imperfect lives. I made several plans and timetables to put the kids to bed and rouse them by a strict schedule so we could all sit around the table and have a family breakfast before we all headed to our destinations – with bright cheery smiles and pretty clothes. The reality is that most mornings, we are scrambling to get out of the house on time, I have to forcibly strap my daughter into her seat and I have a headache before I even get to work. But I’ve settled - I’ve settled for the fact that I get my kids to school on time and in one piece – my son had no tardies on his report card this semester - that’s enough for me to deserve a pat on the back. I’ve let the idea of a perfect morning go. My Achilles heel is the weekday morning – it could be any time of the day or week for you. If you can let go of that mental image of what bedtime or family time should look like, you might be able to breathe a bit and enjoy the time you do have together, imperfect as it may be. I have friends who have not been on vacation in years because they are scared to travel with babies on a plane – they stress over every detail. Why not just pack and go and take things as they come? Doesn’t stressing out so much over the planning sort of ruin the point of a stress free “perfect” time? Why not just accept that here we are – with a busy, full life and so much to be grateful for – if the kid throws a tantrum at a hotel, it will not be the end of the world. The world will deal with it, and so should we.
4. Lists are your friend – My husband likes to joke about my lists – he finds them everywhere around the house. On little scraps of paper or at the back of notebooks, even scribbled in the margins of calendars. There are the grocery lists, packing lists and shopping lists. But besides that, I make lists for tasks I need to do , bills I need to pay, people I need to call – even a list of things I need to make lists for. The feeling of checking things off as they get done gives me satisfaction and a sense that I’ve achieved something. Going down the list gives me a feeling of control over my usually chaotic day. When the kids are lethargic in getting their tasks done (everyday!), I quickly write out a list of tasks they need to do and that seems to spur them right along. My four year old cannot read yet but she asks me to read out each task to her and then loves to check it off as soon as she is done. I recommend lists to everyone – for getting a grasp on everything happening, for making sure things get done and just for the vindication of checking of the first or last item on any list.
5. Cultivate your network – This piece of advice is more personal and depends on your personality. Having grown up in a very social environment, I’ve always been used to having people around our house. Luckily, my husband and I both like to entertain, so almost every other weekend, we have a family or two over for dinner. It sounds like more work to spend your free time planning dinner parties, but for us, it really energizes us to see friends and spend a relaxed evening with them. Since most of our friends have children of similar ages as ours, it is a good time for them as well and helps them to build their friendships. When we are in need, it is these friends we turn to – if I am running late for a school pick up, if I need an emergency play date or a weekend evening out, these are the people that step in. So while we don’t make friends with an eye to using them, it’s definitely a more fulfilling and pleasant life with an active social calendar.

Above all the tricks of the trade, the biggest to-do is to slow down, relax and enjoy the many opportunities and blessings you have. It came to me one day as I was rushing to work after having a crazed morning getting the kids ready and dropped off. My husband too, had an early meeting, so we were both running as soon as we woke. As I walked along the office parking lot, I was resentful and fuming as I pitied myself over all that I had to do. And then I realized how lucky I was to be in a job where I was needed and wanted, to have these kids and to have a husband who was busy in a job he enjoyed. Just walking along the parking lot, I suddenly feeling lighter and happier and so can you . All it needs is a little shift in perspective and some good old lists.

A reasonable discussion - on Healthcare?

I found this video today on a political site I love and reference often, the DailyKos. I've been following the HealthCare debate and discussion and I don't profess to getting it all. More than the technicalities of any sort of plan, what has baffled me more is the objections that have surfaced along the way - I dont get how healthcare for all is a choice people would choose not to have and I dont understand the comparisons to Hitler. There is much more that I dont get but coming back to this video, I posted it here because of the way Sen Franken handles and turns around a hostle crowd through reasonable discussion and dialog. Its masterful to watch. What rankled me was this comment that one person in the audience made about McAllen which Sen Franken quotes as having high healthcare costs. "isn't that where the immigrants are?" the man in the audience says. Of course, I object to the insinuation that immigrants are responsible for all that is wrong, everywhere that it is wrong. Over the past few months, this disturbing trend of racism going overt rather than covert has made me cringe and think hard about my place in this nation.


Al Franken counters that by saying that McAllen has a similar demographic makeup as El Paso where healthcare costs are half what they are in McAllen. This whole discussion is based on an article written by Atul Gawande for the New Yorker. I read that artcle too and like anything written by Atul Gawande, it is an excellent piece - well researched and thoughtfully documented. Here is a link to the article
http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2009/06/01/090601fa_fact_gawande

Off topic again - but I am a fan of Atul's writing and have enjoyed everything that he has written. His book Better is a great look at the healthcare system - its challenges and wins - in America and other place around the world. If you are looking for an intelligent, abosrbing read, get this book.

Finally, here is a less nuanced and more straightforward pitch for President Obama to address the issues and objections around healthcare - this is from Bill Moyer's journal
http://www.pbs.org/moyers/journal/09042009/watch3.html

Sometimes you have to call it like you see it - a crackpot is a crackpot - diplomacy be damned!!

Media Consumption

As a proponent of balance in all aspects of life, I was amused to read this article from Wired magazine about balancing out your media consumption. I turned up my nose at first - 9 hours a day of media consumption? What are you talking about - I dont watch that much TV or play that many games. Then I quickly came to my senses and realized the amount of time I spend on my computer - reading the news, microblogging (yes - Facebook & Twitter count). So, whatever your media diet - here's a quick read for balancing it out. Just one more food pyramid

http://www.wired.com/culture/lifestyle/magazine/17-08/by_media_diet

Career Skills

My work is mainly around analytics - making sense of data and numbers and presenting it to folks who can then use that information. Since I work in Digital Marketing, one of the blogs I follow is Avinash Kaushik's Occam's Razor. This is a great post that I just read and it encapsulates a lot of my personal beliefs about work and building your career. It is a long post and devoted to web analytics, so in case you're not a web data junkie, I'm distilling here the 3 general principles that I think have been helpful to my career so far.

Here, in a nutshell, are my core beliefs about building a career and interviewing for positions - a vital part of building a successful career.
1. Think broad - Its great to be a specialist but its more important to ground your specialty into the bigger context. What does your skill and knowledge mean for your colleagues, for the company and for the industry? How is what you do relevant? Asking those questions and making sure you have an answer is a good way to know you're relevant and adding value. It makes a great pitch to be able to tell a potential employer exactly how your job and work tied in to the company's business.

2. Be interested - My personal curiosity just forces me to do this a lot - its come in handy when I talk to other people since I always have a good idea of what is happening around me. I borrow ideas for my work, retro fitting projects or ideas that I hear in "What do you do conversation?" to my world. Hearing people talk about their work also gives me ideas on what I want to do next. That way, I can plan a path to the job that interests me - I ask about experiences, skills, education needed for a job that interests me and plan to acquire that set of knowledge. It keeps me ahead of the game so I am not forced to do the next crappy job that opens up. It's also a great way to meet people and build networks.

3. Take Charge - One advice repeated by various mentors to me is "Act like you're in the job you want. If you want to be GM, start to think, act and be like the GM." Ask what she would do in a given situation and do the same. Avinash, in his post talks about getting around company and policy limitations. In the online analytics world, he talks about getting your own blog, your own analytics account and playing around with it. Creating and managing a blog will provide expertise in every area - strategy, creative, content, marketing and so on. You want to be a project manager - why not volunteer to manage the next fundraiser at your kid's school? Nothing better than jumping in and getting your hands dirty. There is a confidence that you'll get from having done the job that no amount of reading can provide you.

So, in summary, look around, ask questions and then take charge. It will add to your basket of skills and that shows when you walk into an interview. I have lots more to share on successful interviewing - but more on that topic later.

Politically Correct...OR... Who gives a ***

Enough of the "taking it slow" - saw the doctor for my post surgical visit today. Clean bill - no cancer, no nothing, everything is great - for now (see, I can't help it - the cautious one in me rises every time I whoop with glee about anything). Wish my credit card bill would come in so clean. Anyway, "taking it slow" has never been my style.

So back to work this week and I've been faced with an interesting challenge - delivering bad news to Executives is never easy, even when you're not the one to cause the bad news. I think of my job as close to journalism - I watch, monitor and report. So would you blame the news reporter for reading out the bad news? I wouldn't - but I would certainly hope that the reporter had checked their facts and made sure the news was accurate and relevant for the audience. That's sort of what I do and sometimes, the news is not so good and I know its not what people want to hear. But where do you draw the line between doing the right thing and being savvy about it? Luckily, I have some great people I work with who helped me think this through and arrive at the right conclusion. In case you find yourself in a similar situation ever, here is my wisdom
1. Pay a nod to the politics but let it not be your north star - you're likely headed for the cliff if you do.
2. Always, always verify and check your news, facts, numbers - whatever you are reporting
3. To the best of your ability, have a point of view about the situation
4. But, don't be afraid to say " I Don't Know" - sometimes you really don't. Fabricating is worse - believe me.
5. Finally, have a solution - or at least some proposals for remedying the situation.

This was top of mind for me when I watched video of Barney Frank confronting a woman at a Town Hall meeting - chops to both for having the courage to speak their minds but if there ever was a moment when political correctness was thrown to the wind, it was this.


A different kind of political correctness was also thrown out the window by Mrs Obama as she stepped out of Air Force One wearing shorts. I didn't realize this was a big deal until I read about some people wondering if it was appropriate for her to do so. Hmm, I wonder if it's appropriate for people to be stuck in time and to not see that that people have moved on - in shorts?
Whether it was a good look or not is another story but seriously, do people really sit around pondering the propriety of what the first lady should wear to a hiking trip in the Grand Canyon?


On the topic of fashion - that's one area where I happily toe the line - so I am always glad for these helpful little tit bits from the people who know these things. The folks at Instyle ( I used to work there, you know! I know I've said that before, it just always begs to be said again) compiled the style guidelines for Fall - I'm probably going to be getting more cardigans than motorcycle jackets, but hey, to each their own. And NO JUDGING - remember.
http://www.instyle.com/instyle/package/falltrends/photos/0,,20297053_20297775_20657223,00.html

Fitness

This week has been one of forced relaxation - occasionally, I've had guilt pangs about doing nothing but eating, watching TV and sleeping - but hey, that's what I'm supposed to be doing. It does not come easy to me. However, I was surprised this morning when I weighed myself and I've been pretty much at the same weight as usual when I try to get to the gym a few times a week, watch what I eat and run around like a chicken with it's head cut off. I mentioned this to my husband and he took the credit for feeding me healthy food this entire week. What I have not shared with him yet, since I've been forcing him to go running at least once or twice a week, is this article from the NY Times.

While neither of us, my husband or me, can claim to be any sort of fitness freak, maybe for once, he can be part of the "coolio trend" - ugh!! Apparently, the hottest accessory the hipsters of Brooklyn are flashing these days is a cute little belly. Double ugh!! Just as Puneet was getting into the whole running thing too :-((

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/13/fashion/13POTBELLY.html?_r=1&ref=fashion

Rest & Recovery

On Friday, August 7th, I had surgery to remove part of my thyroid. There were some nodules in there that the doctors thought were better out than in. So here I am, day 3 after the surgery, trying hard to stay in bed, give my body some rest and allow it to recover. In the crazy routine that is my regular life, I, like all busy working parents, crave for this - uninterrupted rest time. But now that it's here - thrust upon me, its so hard to just lay in bed and relax. I'm seeing a million chores around me that need to be done, I'm thinking of tasks I can accomplish without walking around too much. But for once, I'm trying to banish those thoughts as soon as they spring up in my head. Its not fair to me or to my family, I realize, for me not to rest and recover so I can be back a 100% when it is time to swing back into things. I'm going to take the time I need to feel better - things will wait, all the paperwork, all the cleaning, all the phone calls - everything will be there when I am back up. So for now, I'm putting away the computer, the notebook and the pen. I'm drinking plenty of water, taking my medicine and just relaxing - its hard work, after all!

Motivation

Here, in America, we all work so hard - well, most of us, anyway. So what is it that keeps us going? I've thought about this for various professional exercises where they made me think about the great days I've had at work. What were the most stimulating & challenging times I had. Again and again, I come back to this - I am happy when I am working hard and achieving something. For the past 2-3 weeks, work has been a complete grind. I've been up well past midnight on most nights and then constantly busy in the office from 9-5. Had a great presentation yesterday and even though I got home only around 8, it felt good. It actually felt great - I had been working hard on this presentation and it went off great and that made it all worth it.

7 year old's probably have a different perspective on work & enjoyment. Arjun, my 7 year old, can whip through his math problems pretty easily. But the writing part has him stuck like glue. He dawdles and sits there - yesterday, he went an hour and wrote 2 words - seriously, 2 words on the page. We've bullied and threatened him and of course, that doesn't work. When does it ever? As I was losing my patience with him again last night - as he drank his 4th glass of water in 10 minutes - while I was supervising his writing, it struck me. Maybe its just too big of a body of work for him to grasp. I had asked him to write 2 pages on a wedding we just went to. I changed that and asked him to do 2 sentences instead.
"2 sentences?" he was incredulous.
"Yes, just 2."
"I can do more - I can do 3, no 4. Actually, I'll keep writing till I run out of sentences." He literally transformed before my eyes and attacked his work. He ended up writing a half page but I'm happy with that. We're going to do that more regularly till he masters the half page and then move on to more.
So, of course, it's all about knowing your audience and positioning accordingly.